As it stands, if every seat in my car is occupied, we're 3 cupholders short. Why can't we have more cupholders? Are there regulations preventing this?

The musicians who are paid to write music for when you're on hold, I hope they feel dirty.

Here's my Christmas. I knew I had to work and I had to close. But I thought, "hey, it's Christmas, no one will come." I got here and found out one kid didn't show up, so I had to take his spot. We were crazy busy and largely understaffed. Then I found out that the last movie didn't get out till one. Which means I'm here till one thirty. The good news is that kid got fired. I mean that's good right? Not really, cause guess who now has a double shift tomorrow?

The whole truth is better than the convenient truth.

Having a smart phone really helps you pretend to be occupied when you need to look busy or just have no idea what you're suppo

sed to do.

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So I need eylets for this thing I'm making, and so I headed over to Joann. When I pulled in I only two other cars. At first I felt bad that business was like this for them, but when I parked I realized that I had gotten here early and the other two cars were old ladies waiting to go in. I got to craft store early so I could wait to go in. This is the lamest I've ever been.

On the topic of craft supplies, I've noticed most do-it-yourself project but whenever I go into craft stores, I spend a ton of money... I feel so gay for saying that.

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Women and men's reaction to heartbreak is actually the exact opposite. Women assume there's something wrong with the entire gender and "swear off men" whereas men assume that one was just a [whatever] and goes out looking for more women.

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